Song Lyrics

Now, Big Moe was a catfish,
and he only had one wish.
Big Moe wanted to live to a hundred and five.
So, he got him some fish books,
and learned all about fish hooks.
Then sat back and watched all his fishy friends
meet their sad demise.
His ego increased in size.
Turned out he was not so wise
the day he got caught in that old bottom line.

Stanley Crock was a salesman,
and his spiel never failed him.
Stanley pictured himself filthy rich as can be.
So, he hornswoggled housewives,
even bamboozled barflies.
There wasn't a scam or a rip off
that Stanley hadn't tried.
He owned lots of real estate,
but, Stanley found out too late.
His assets got caught in his own bottom line.

So, one day Stan went fishin',
he saw Moe's big tail swishin'.
Then his eyes went "kaching", and he saw dollar signs.
Stanley swore he would catch him,
and sell tickets to see him.
In less than a year that man figured he'd
be a millionaire.
He thought he could reel Moe in
by making a deal with him.
That catfish would go for his best bottom line.

Stanley threw Moe an offer.
Moe bit hook, line, and bobber.
Then he found himself stuck, tangled up in a net.
That fish started to struggle,
and Stan ran into trouble.
Then he fell right into the drink/lake, what a
shame he couldn't swim.
So, Moe's gasping on dry land,
third time going down for Stan.
They both met their end 'cause of one bottom line.

Folks, here's a lesson for us all,
the greedier you are the harder you fall.
Ain't healthy to be so gullible.
Don't let greed lure you in.
By using your head and your heart you can save your behind,
and that's the bottom line.

Laura Caviani, Marissa Dodge

The duration of The Bottom Line is 4:08 minutes and seconds.